S12E1 - Suite Smells of Excess
When the guys take Bobby to a college football game, their hijinks land them in a VIP box suite and calling plays for the visiting team.
Sept. 23, 2007, midnight
S12E2 - Bobby Rae
To impress a girl, Bobby protests against soda machines in the school. However, since the teachers have been using the drink machine money to pay for their "retreat", they decide to fight back. Meanwhile, Dale decides to record his friends' witty quotes and put them all in a book.
Sept. 30, 2007, midnight
S12E3 - The Powder Puff Boys
Hank encourages Bobby when he is asked to cheerleader for the girls in the school's annual Powder Puff game. Bobby soon learns that there is a tradition and Hank, Bill, Dale and Principal Moss were once "Powder Puff Boys" themselves. However, the boys learn that Peggy and the PTA Are trying to put a stop to the tradition.
Oct. 7, 2007, midnight
S12E4 - Four Wave Intersection
Arlen is hit by a heat wave and Hank and the gang take the kids to the water park. Unfortunately, when they have to tangle with a group of surfer bullies, Boomhauer, who is usually cool, winds up embarrassing himself. Meanwhile, Bill becomes known as the famous "Heat-Waver" when he begins to stand on the side of the highway and wave to motorists.
Oct. 14, 2007, midnight
S12E5 - Death Picks Cotton
When the family goes out to a restaurant where the food is cooked at the table Cotton throws a tantrum and gets into a fight with the chef. The fight leaves Cotton near death in the hospital.
Nov. 11, 2007, midnight
S12E6 - Raise the Steaks
After Hank falls in love with organic food he starts his own mini co-op garden in his back yard.
Nov. 18, 2007, midnight
S12E7 - Tears of an Inflatable Clown
Bobby gets mixed up with racial intolerance at Tom Landry Junior High. Meanwhile, Lucky hurts himself by catching a frisbee made of barbed wire and the gang has to convince him to go to the hospital.
Nov. 25, 2007, midnight
S12E8 - The Minh Who Knew Too Much
Mihn joins the Arlen Gun Club so that she can practise her skeet-shooting skills and become a member of the Nine Rivers Country Club team. However, Minh loses track of the goal when she starts to identify with her "hillbilly" neighbors.
Dec. 9, 2007, midnight
S12E9 - Dream Weaver
After they have financial troubles, Nancy convinces Dale to go on a "vocation vacation" to learn a new career. Unfortunately, Dale picks basket-weaving, and he's not very good at it. Meanwhile, Peggy, Bill and Kahn try to create the next great Internet video.
Dec. 16, 2007, midnight
S12E10 - Doggone Crazy
Ladybird is put on a list of vicious dogs after she gets a little crazy and bites Hank. Afterwards, Hank is urged by a veterinarian to take Ladybird to a "dog spiritualist".
Jan. 6, 2008, midnight
S12E11 - Trans-Fascism
Hank helps Buck Strickland battle the Arlen City Council and a rival restaurant after "Sugarfoots" loses its business due to a local ban on the sale of foods containing trans fats.
Feb. 10, 2008, midnight
S12E12 - Untitled Blake McCormick Project
Bill falls in love after he has a blind date with Charlene, a hot single mother. However, Dale's intuition tells him something is not quite right with the whole situation.
Feb. 17, 2008, midnight
S12E13 - The Accidental Terrorist
Hank buys Peggy a new car, and like he has always done he pays sticker price for it. However, after he realizes that he has been ripped off for years, he plots revenge against the car salesman.
March 2, 2008, midnight
S12E14 - Lady and Gentrification
Hank's agrees to speak at Enrique's daughter's quinceañera. However, some of Peggy's real-estate clients fall in love with the quaint Mexican neighborhood and start to move in.
March 9, 2008, midnight
S12E15 - Behind Closed Doors
Peggy becomes over-protective after a child goes missing in Arlen.
March 16, 2008, midnight
S12E16 - Pour Some Sugar on Kahn
Kahn escapes to the bar and takes up Karaoke after Minh's father comes to visit. Meanwhile, Bobby and Peggy compete in an escalating game where they try to outdo each other.
March 30, 2008, midnight
S12E17 - Six Characters in Search of a House
Peggy has trouble selling a house when she realizes that the current residents are scaring away the buyers, so she hires actors to play their parts.
April 6, 2008, midnight
S12E18 - The Courtship of Joseph's Father
Dale's son becomes the star quarterback for Landry High School, but Dale pushes the boy to accept a private school's offer, which includes a cash contract.
April 13, 2008, midnight
S12E19 - Strangeness on a Train
Stressed that her birthday parties never live up to her expectations, Peggy plans herself a disco-themed party on a mystery train, but after Luanne ruins the surprise, Peggy worries her parties will always end badly. However, a new mystery arises after a couple sneaks away for some private time in the train bathroom, and the partygoers must figure out who did it.
April 27, 2008, midnight
8.0
S12E20 - Cops and Robert
Bobby has to work as a deputy for the school's police officer after he is framed for throwing a soda can. Meanwhile, Hank accidentally takes the wallet of a man he thought stole his own wallet, however when he tries to return the wallet the man does not take it too well.
May 4, 2008, midnight
S12E21 - It Came from the Garage
Wanting to spend some quality time with his son, Hank distracts Dale, Bill and Boomhauer with a boat building competition. However, when bats attack the construction garage, Hank has to give up his idea of spending time with Bobby.
May 11, 2008, midnight
S12E22 - Life: A Loser's Manual
Luanne's long-lost father and Peggy's brother Hoyt, a two-strike felon, comes to Arlen. After Hoyt gets caught committing another crime, Lucky feels bad and takes the blame, leaving Hoyt free to continue his life of crime.
May 18, 2008, midnight