S3E1 - YMCA Water Is Only 1% Water (99% Old People Hair)
Raph & Carolyn hold weights and wear a mouth prop for the entire episode. The traffic news blows up.
March 2, 2020, midnight
S3E2 - News Anchor Wants to Sell You His Smelly Car
Carolyn ignores the weather to pitch her screenplay. Raph tells a starchy story about girl's sports.
March 9, 2020, midnight
S3E3 - “I Hate My Kids” Says Most Moms
Ryan Creamer & Trapp report on a saucy skating event. Elaine Carroll freestyle raps about Netflix.
March 16, 2020, midnight
S3E4 - Conservative Man Accidentally Donates $1 Million to Redtube
Grant & Rekha talk hot topics & topical hotness. Ryan Creamer covers a bird birth at a Clippers game.
March 30, 2020, midnight
S3E5 - Announcing Frozen 3, Based on the Novel "Push" by Sapphire
Grant & Raph report on rabies babies. Zac Oyama shows how many marshmallows can fit in his mouth.
April 6, 2020, midnight
S3E6 - BTK Killer Gives a Foreboding Weather Forecast
Hulk Jr. improvises a eulogy and Shukri R. Abdi mimes her report on a live nuclear strike.
April 27, 2020, midnight
S3E7 - News Crew Plans Terrible Trip to the Beach
Ryan Creamer reports on the wet weather and tries to whistle with a spoonful of flour in his mouth.
March 30, 2020, midnight
S3E8 - Special Musical Broadcast Really Wails
Shukri and Ally perform music for Brennan and Ryan to dance to.
April 13, 2020, midnight
S3E9 - A Report from the CollegeHumor Office
Trapp & Katie read a riveting report from the office. The team shares their favorite Grant memories.
April 20, 2020, midnight
S3E10 - U2 Gets Me Too’d at a Scooby Doo Read-Through
Local man Roger rants about snake socks. Brennan reports from a county fair that’s lost its bear.
May 4, 2020, midnight
S3E11 - Millennials Are Ruining Our Trash
Lily and Mano reveal that brains don't do anything. Carolyn lists off everything millennials have ever ruined.
May 11, 2020, midnight
S3E12 - Mom Disappointed in Son… Again
Rekha tells a meaty maternal story about Trapp, and Brennan dives into Breaking News lore.
May 18, 2020, midnight
S3E13 - God Does a Really Mean Impression of John Lithgow
Straight from the Vatican, our news team report that God just fucking HATES actor John Lithgow.
May 25, 2020, midnight
S3E14 - My Weekend Was the Plot of Mrs. Doubtfire
Erika tries to understand the nuances of Mrs. Doubtfire while Brennan explains sin-based weather.
June 1, 2020, midnight
S3E15 - Hot Dogs Are Made from People (but Still Tasty)
Kellen and Zac report on the truth behind hot dogs. Tao warns of a product recall on dildos.
June 22, 2020, midnight
S3E16 - Good Morning, River View High!
The student news team at River View High School bring you the latest news on field trip tragedies.
June 8, 2020, midnight
S3E17 - Welcome to Bug News
A bunch of bugs bring you the latest in bug news. Buzz buzz!
June 15, 2020, midnight
S3E18 - Brian Hitler Is One of the 10 Worst Brians
Trapp tries to name the worst Brians while Brennan explains exactly how to talk to your neighbors.
June 29, 2020, midnight
S3E19 - I'm Getting a FaceTime from a Greasy Little Puppet
The news crew report on the Wight Savior Country Musical Festival and how not to flirt.
July 6, 2020, midnight
S3E20 - Handshakes for Men, Hugs for Women
Amy shows off some new dances. Brennan is a 12 year old trapped in an adult's body.
July 13, 2020, midnight
S3E21 - All Hail Cello Chigglers!
Patrick reveals he's Mrs. Butterworth's loving husband while Lily reports from inside your anus.
July 27, 2020, midnight
S3E22 - Spit in Your Hand to Honor the Troops
Ryan and Amy do the hot new dance craze that’s sweeping the nation.
Aug. 3, 2020, midnight
S3E23 - True Confessions of Real Newscasters
Rekha and Becca reveal their actual experiences and opinions. Grant shows off his best impressions.
Aug. 10, 2020, midnight
S3E24 - Making Peanut Butter Sandwiches with a Bowling Ball
Zac talks about a hostage situation gone wrong, while Ally gets real about a missing persons case.
Aug. 17, 2020, midnight
S3E25 - Huge Idiot Climbs Mount Everest
Carolyn reveals she never saw It: Chapter Two while Kellen reports on a group of arm-loving doctors.
Aug. 24, 2020, midnight